Tag Archives: food

Any Child Could Keep a Toilet Clean and Pure – Sani-flush [1938]

I’m no expert but I’m fairly certain that if you give your small child powerful, caustic chemicals and expect them to use them to clean the toilet, certain individuals at Child Protective Services might just give you a visit.

Sani-Flush 1938

Sani-Flush 1938

Ad Text:

No more scrubbing toilets. No more smelly disinfectants.  Don’t even touch the bowl with your hands.  SANI-FLUSH is made scientifically to clean toilets!

Just dash a little in the bowl.  (Follow directions on the can.)  Flush the toilet and that’s all there is to it!  Stains and spots vanish.  Odors are banished.  Germs are killed.  The hidden trap that no amount of scrubbing can reach is purified.  The bowl glistens like new.  SANI-FLUSH can’t injure plumbing connections.  It is also effective for cleaning automobile radiators (directions on the can).  Sold by grocery, drug, hardware, and five-and-ten-cent stores.  25c and 10c sizes.  The Hygienic Products Co., Canton O.

I’ll give them credit.  The product sure SOUNDS easy to use.  I’ve seen chewing gum wrappers with more complicated instructions.  Clearly though, this is a vast oversimplification.  And one has to admit that the can must just be absolutely crammed with directions.  It’s practically a comprehensive manual on how to clean everything from toilets to car radiators.  I’m fairly certain that sometime in the 40s this product was also sold as a delicious bedtime snack.  Sani-Flush: Good for what ails ya!  And it’ll clean your toilet too!

 

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Be Really Refreshed… Coca Cola 1959

One would get the idea, perusing Coke ads over the years, that we’re supposed to get the idea that this product is just tooth-chatteringly cold.  I suppose that’s generally the case but the marketing here would seem to indicate that the Coca-Cola bottling company invented the concept.

Coca-Cola 1959

Ad Text:

Reach for Coca-Cola… and be really refreshed! Only Coke gives you the cheerful lift that’s bright and lively… the cold crisp taste that deeply satisfies! Pause often… and always drink Coke!

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Filed under Coca-Cola, Drinks, Food and Drink

Levi’s Panatela Slacks – not $lacks [1973]

Today’s post makes me absolutely weep with nostalgia. I yearn so much to go back to the days when the clothes featured in this ad were not only acceptable but in fact in vogue. Now that you’ve had your monthly dose of sarcasm, I bring you Panatela Slacks.

1973 Levi's Panatela Slacks

1973 Levi's Panatela Slacks

Ad Text:

The people who’ve been selling you slacks have been pulling your leg. They would have you believe that a fine pair of slacks always carries a fine price tag. “Fine slacks,” they intone, “show meticulous – and therefore expensive – attention to detail. Pockets lie flat. Patterns match nicely at the seams. Proper stitches are in their proper places. And the rich fabric drapes comfortably on the human form.”

We agree. And we don’t agree. You can certainly tell a fine pair of slacks by how well they’re made. But not by how much they cost! Levi’s Pantela Slacks are priced on a trifle above your average work-around-the-yard pants. Which puts their price six triples below your average work-around-the-office pants.

Yet despite their sensible cost (around $12 to $22, instead of $30 to heaven knows what), the economy of Levi’s Panatela Slacks is noticeable only to your wallet.

Upon close examination, one sees that pockets lie flat; patterns match; stitches are perfect; and the fabric drapes comfortably, naturally and handsomely on your human form. Sometime soon, visit a men’s store and try on a pair of Panatela Slacks. See if you can tell any difference between our Slacks and their $lacks. Other than the $. We’re all but certain that you’ll walk out owning a pair of Panatela Slacks. Because legs were made to be fitted. Not pulled.

Putting aside the absolute atrocity of the product being sold here by today’s standards of fashion, the text of this ad strikes me very favorably. It’s articulate and detailed and fairly convincing. Not to mention, I dig anything that a guy with a mustache like that wants to sell me.

PS: I can’t deny that those slacks with the dollar bills on them really rock my world. I wonder if they come in that king of fabrics, polyester. Wow!

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Filed under Clothing

A smart move… La-Z-Boy, A Tradition of comfort for Fifty Years 1979

Boy, what I wouldn’t give for a nice easy chair in this particular pattern.  You never know when you’ll need a nice strong emetic.

 

La-Z-Boy 1979

La-Z-Boy 1979

Ad Text:

Like a warm fire and the checkerboard, La-Z-Boy chairs have become a part of the American home. La-Z-Boy means comfort, quality and value that endures. We wouldn’t have lasted over fifty years if the pepole didn’t trust the La-Z-Boy name. Millions of Americans enjoy their La-Z-Boy chairs every day. Haven’t you lived without one long enough? See the La-Z-Boy difference in quality reclining chairs wherever fine furniture is sold.

La-Z-Boy Chair Company
Monroe, Michigan 48161

La-Z-Boy was founded in the 1920s and is still in business today. Does this ad make you want to buy one or vomit all over one?

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The pause for people-on-the-go… Coca-Cola 1941

The year is 1941 and the world is at war. Meanwhile, this fancy Press Agent in a smooth hat and suit is enjoying a tiny glass of coke. Perhaps he’s a giant.

Coca-Cola 1941

Coca-Cola 1941

Ad Text:


People on-the-go are never too busy to go to the soda fountain. It’s a place where the hurried are glad to take a minute the pause that refreshes with ice-cold Coca-Cola… that refreshing little stop that keeps you going. Try it. 5c

You taste its quality
Experience proves that nothing takes the place of quality. You taste the quality of ice-cold Coca-Cola. Again and again you enjoy the charm of its delicious taste… and its cool, clean after-sense of complete refreshment. Thirst asks nothing more.

Now we’re told that we’re not too busy to go for a soda. What does this ad make you think of? Would you buy this product? Would you date this guy in the hat?

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Filed under Coca-Cola, Drinks, Food and Drink

George Washington’s Instant Coffee 1920

First of all, it’s not THAT George Washington. This George Washington was a Belgian inventor holding patents for a few dozen products including instant coffee. His company was created in 1910 and the brand lasted until 1961 when it was discontinued.

1920 George Washington Coffee

1920 George Washington Coffee

Ad Text:

Made in the cup at the table
The Easier kind of Coffee – No Coffee Pot Needed
G. Washington’s coffee dissolves instantly in hot or cold water. Absolutely pure, delicious coffee always. Each cup to order.

All the preparing scientifically and perfectly done by Mr. Washington’s refining process – which eliminates the woody fibre, chaff and waste.

Send 10c for a Special Trial Size. Recipe Booklet Free.

Admittedly, the need to state that there’s no woody fibre or waste in the coffee gets my attention. Food and beverage quality fail 90 years ago.

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Filed under Coffee, Drinks, Food and Drink

Jose Cuervo Tequila 1981

Looking at this ad you can sure tell just how close we are to the 70s. Fashions of the day were… especially unfashionable. Note the all-denim on the left and the sea of spandex and generally stretchy stuff everywhere else. The moose, however, is ludicrously fashionable in those spiffy sunglasses.

Jose Cuervo - 1981

Ad Text:

9 to 5 I sell stocks. Weekends, I bust loose with my buddies & Cuervo

We are intended to believe, I presume, that these motley-dressed people are professionals of some sort. I’m certainly hopeful that I never become unlucky enough to invest with someone who has such poor taste in clothing.

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Filed under alcoholic, Uncategorized

Cola-Cola 1959

You can tell a lot about how a society wants to see itself by its advertising. Clearly, in 1959 we were all just idiotically happy eating our sandwiches and drinking our sodas. I’d be absolutely astonished if the girl in this picture actually finished that huge meal though and the drive-in is very trusting to be handing out glass salt and pepper shakers to every car.

Coca-Cola 1959

Ad Text:

Brighten every bite with Coke! Only Coca-Cola gives you that cheerful lift… that cold crisp taste! No wonder it’s the real refreshment… anytime… anywhere you’re driving! Pause… for Coke!

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Filed under Coca-Cola, Drinks, Food and Drink

Who’s drinking all that Diet-Rite Cola? 1965

The answer to the title question seems to be….

  • a woman on a boat who looks like she just got done doing a cigarette ad.
  • a guy who was cut out of some other ad and pasted sloppily over a picture of a cornfield
  • a boy at a baseball game who’s way too happy to be drinking a diet drink
  • another woman who’s wearing a dress made from set of really ugly drapes

Diet-Rite Cola 1965

Ad Text:

Diet-Rite is the new family favorite of millions – the best-tasting cola you can buy. Better-tasting than old-time favorites… or their low-calorie offshoots. No sugar at all. Less than 1 calorie per bottle. Bring home a carton of Diet-Rite Cola for your family…today!

One must admit that this ad certainly wins the prize for most hyphens and unnecessary ellipsis in a paragraph. But then it was 1965, an age when the U.S. had tons and tons of extra punctuation just laying around not being used for anything.  Also, I can’t help but be shocked at their low-blow pot-shots… at old-time favorites…

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Filed under Drinks, Food and Drink, Other Soda

Maxwell House Coffee – 1910

Everyone’s heard about Maxwell House Coffee, Good to the Last Drop!  But this ad has the bonus that it also mentions that more obscure product Maxwell House Tea.  At over 100 years old, this ad also treats us to a mode of dress not often seen in the coffee drinking masses of today.  Note too the pipe.

Maxwell House Coffee - 1910

Ad Text:

In its flavor as unchanging as time.  The same yesterday, today and tomorrow.

— If you cannot buy “Maxwell House” in your locality, write to our nearest plant for prices, and give the name of your dealer.

It’s interesting to note the emphasis on consistency of the product. This from a time in history when you might not necessarily get the same product with every purchase.

So would you buy this product?  Good vibes or bad ones?

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Filed under Coffee, Drinks, Food and Drink